A few years went by and I met my husband (now ex husband). Everything was great in the beginning. We dated for a year, lived together for a year and then married in 2001. It was wonderful. We worked together as a team very well. With no children life was great! We traveled, had adventures, built our business, I attended school and worked outside our business full time and life was good. He was very caring, nurturing and attentive.
About 4 years into our marriage I started to notice that he had changed. His behaviors had changed. He started complaining about how much time I spent on my school. He started coming home later, I couldn't get a hold of him on his phone frequently. People started showing up at the house that I had never met before. His behavior was becoming eratic. Instead of coming in the house when he got home he would stay out in his shop for awhile. He wanted to travel less, he stopped going on adventures like rock climbing, camping, boating, exploring new towns, etc with me. I tried to talk to him to find out if there was an issue but he never would say anything was wrong.
The behaviors got worse and worse. It seemed like the more successful our business grew and the closer I was to finishing school the worse he became. One night he failed to come home and would not answer the phone. I was so worried, I called his mother and a couple of his friends and one of his brothers. Everyone said they had not heard from him. I was up all night worried. He showed up around daylight as if he had done nothing wrong and would not tell me where he had been. I put all the cards on the table and told him that I was not going to be in a relationship with someone who did not have enough respect for me to at least pick up a phone and call and let me know he was ok. I wanted to know where he had been all night and he just kept saying with friends. I was in no mood to argue with him so I told him that I was not going to put up with his eractic behavior any longer and if he couldn't tell me what was going on then he needed to make a decision about if he wanted to be in this marriage or not.
Over the next few weeks his behavior became worse and worse. Contractors were calling me saying he hadn't shown up to job sites, strange people were calling the house and coming by more and more, and his behavior flew off the charts of weirdness. He became very paranoid about people breaking into the shop. I would catch him sitting in the house in the dark staring out the windows saying that cars had been driving by (we lived 13 miles out in the middle of no where on a dirt road that had very little traffic ever) he would go to town to do something and not come back for hours on end with no contact. I was fed up.
Since he wouldn't tell me what was going on and none of his friends or family "seemed" to know anything I decided I was going to have figure it out on my own.
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