Letting go ............continued

I began checking the cell phone bill, and figuring out exactly where it was that he was spending his time. I would go by job sites and discover he had not been at any of them all day and that no one had heard from him. By doing this I discovered that some of the people he was hanging out with were not so desirable and actually had prior records with mostly theft, burglary, and drug charges. I also discovered that one particular house he was spending a lot of his time at was a major drug dealer in the area.

I gathered all my proof and sent it off to my attorney and my "mother". I packed my bags and made arrangements to go out of town to a family property. I waited for him to return home one morning after staying out all night. When he arrived he looked like crap and I new I had made the right decision. I informed him that I knew what was going on with him. I told him that I was not going to risk my life and my happiness because he had decided to be engaging in drug activity. I told him that I was leaving town for awhile and that by the time I got back he needed to decide if he wanted to married to me, or not. I told him that the decision to stay married meant that he could not engage in the activity he was involved in and that he had to go to therapy or rehab. It was his choice. I told him this was not open for negotiation. I loaded up my dogs and I left. I stayed gone for two weeks.

While I was away he called several times. He stated he loved me and didn't want to lose me. I agreed to my terms. I told him I would call and make arrangements for the therapy session. He wanted me to attend with him so I agreed. I called made an appointment and then called and told him I would be arriving back home an hour prior to the appointment and that we would drive together. (the appointment was 3 days away).

I called him that morning and asked him if he still wanted to attend the therapy and make efforts to fix things. He said he did. I informed him that I would be home in a few hours and we would start. I drove home and about half an hour prior to arriving back to town I called the house. No answer. I called his cell phone. No answer. I continued driving home to discover he was not there. I called his cell phone again. No answer. I left him a voice mail that I was home and was about to leave to go to the session. I gave him directions and told him that this was his last chance and if he backed out I would be driving to the attorney's office after the session to start divorce proceedings if he did not show up.

I arrived at the therapy session and spent an hour in session. He never showed. I talked to the therapist about what this meant. I left and drove straight to the attorney's office and asked her to start the paperwork. I informed her that I would be leaving town for a couple of weeks and that I wanted a restraining order from the property for him because he had become abusive during some of his eratic behaviors and pushed and shoved me around and I didn't want anything to escalate. I gave her my contact information. I drove out to the house, I packed up clothes and personal items, loaded the truck and the dogs and I headed out. I did not tell anyone other than my attorney and the person who owned the property where i was going that I was leaving or where I would be.

Later that night as I was headed to my destination my cell phone started ringing. I let it go to voice mail each time. At first it was him several times. Each message was angrier and angrier about where I was, what was I doing, and so on. Then they became desperate. "don't leave me, I don't want to lose you, I'll get better." all promises I did not trust. Then his family members started calling me. Then some of his friends. "you don't understand what you are doing to him. Why are you doing this? You need to call him." Each call made me angrier and angrier. No one wanted to help me when I was worried that he was involved with something that could harm him. No one wanted to help when discovered that his problem was meth. Now, that I had followed through on my word and did what I told him I was going to do, his entire world suddenly wanted to help. TOO LATE!